But Moses said to the Lord, “Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue.” Then the Lord said to him, “Who has made man’s mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak.” But he said, “Oh, my Lord, please send someone else.” Exodus 4:10-13 ESV
I can so relate to Moses here and his fear of speaking to crowds. I don’t enjoy public speaking. As a writer, I like to carefully craft my thoughts, edit a draft and delete, delete, delete.
We see ourselves in the mirror of the scriptures, don’t we?
The Lord pulls us away in private and gives us a new assignment. They’re rarely glamorous, done in public or involve public ministry. Nonetheless, we can relate to Moses reaction, far different from Isaiah’s “Here I am, Lord, send me.”
We sometimes look for reasons to talk God out of it. Lord, you’re asking too much of me … I can’t do it. We doubt out own abilities and perhaps doubt God, too.
But let us consider that God is collaborating with us. He needs a representative in that situation and it’s you, His standard-bearer. You’re His light bringer. The mirror isn’t lying. The God of the universe considers you capable, equipped with His Word and His Spirit.
Can you do all things through Christ or not? (Philippians 4:13)
Our responses matter. This is an invitation from God to partnership. So you don’t like the assignment. Ask for grace, His ability within us. Ask for strength, wisdom and courage. Stand up, take ownership over the fear that is lying to you and resist it. It will leave. But not unless you evict it (James 4:7).
We are where we are in life, often because of choices we have made (not always, but generally).
Here’s how I see it. I have some new writing assignments ahead. I can buck up, grow up and put on my big girl pants or not. I can decide to see them through, leaning heavily on His power within to strengthen and His grace when mine wanes. “For we are glad when we are weak and you are strong,”(2 Corinthians 13:9).
Or – I can say, “No, Lord, I can’t do what you’re asking. It’s too hard, it’s beyond my skill set. I’m afraid I’ll mess it up and fail.”
Which is actually translated “I’m unwilling to trust you at this time in that regard.” Abba will love me, regardless. But I can feel His pleasure whenever I choose to trust Him.
Obedience and a partnership offer from the Almighty is before us. I’m standing on Joshua 1:5-9 and doing it afraid. He said He will be with me every step of the way.
What will you choose?
PS: I wrote this last week before heading to Asheville, NC for a writers conference. My manuscripts were not as warmly received as I had hoped. Before me sit pages in need of rewrites and revisions. But the writing call was not rescinded. So I choose to let perseverance have her perfect work, because He is worthy of my absolute best!